Compromised
by Berubi
Summary: While on a recon mission at the Latverian Border, Natasha is badly wounded after things go south and a secret she's been hiding may just come to light while she's laid up. Romanogers. StevexNatasha. Natasha's POV
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One: Fiery hearts and armèd hands.**

* * *

Things were hazy—I was in and out—but I could hear Steve calling.

He sounded distant like he was far out on the field with those Doom drones, but he was just in front of me, shielding us from the oncoming fire. I watched as he gestured for Tony to fall back, and Tony complied—clearing a path through the Latverian forest. I could no longer make out his words as Steve handed me to Tony and fanned us off. I remember feeling the cool metal on my exposed back and the wind and that was enough to knock me out.

When I came to again, I was laid on the long seat at the back of the jet with Tony standing above me. "Hey, Natasha!"

I rolled my head in his direction, laying my shaking hand over my stomach, and tried to speak. The excruciating pain in my abdomen drowned the words I wanted to say in blood.

"Cap, she's barely here. Have Fury meet us over British airspace or somewhere near it if he can, she's gonna need better care quick."

Through my lashes and around Iron Man's body, I could see Steve sending out the call. Tony re-masked himself and removed my arm from my waste. "Natasha, I can't see how deep that wound in your torso is with out looking you over with the suit. Stay as still as you can, okay?"

I coughed up the blood pooling in the back of my throat and opened my eyes enough to see Tony rotate his metal head from my head to my toes. A moment passed before he refocused on my stomach again and when he did, he took a short step back, exposing his face again. I knew what he saw.

"Natasha—you're—"

"Don't—not aloud—please—" I managed to breathe. He came in closer to my face.

"Why didn't you sit this mission out? Are you crazy?!"

"Just please—" I shook my head in disagreeance. I wanted him to be quiet." Steve doesn'—"

I clenched my eyes shut and coughed away from Tony, one last time before I passed out for good.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: And Courage Yet**

* * *

It was a really long time before I was conscious and stable enough to remain so. I knew where I was—on the third level of the Helecarrier, in the infirmary wing—but I had no idea how long I had been here. I examined my hair—the best indicator of hygiene a woman could have after the armpits—and found it knotted and dry with the faint scent of rose hips barely clinging to it. I must have been laid up for a two or three days.

The swift opening of the semi-glass door revealed a blonde woman, both shorter and much younger looking than myself, in all white with a manilla folder in her french manicured hand. She set it down on the metal counter top and came close to me. "You're finally awake, Agent Romanoff."

"Yeah, for the most part." I dryly coughed.

"Well, now that you are awake we can do some further work on you; a blood test will definitely be in order after you took those Vibranium cased bullets to the stomach…."

"Uhh, is it really... necessary?"

The woman, who's name tag read Krystin, gave me a bewildered look. Her baby pink lips quickly closed her gaping mouth with a smile. "Of course, Agent Romanoff! You know we have to be absolutely thorough with these sort of things."

I concealed my gritted teeth behind a halfhearted grin and reluctantly nodded. There would be no use argueing at this point, it would only make the situation much worse.

Krystin's petite form strutted out of the room to fetch something she began to mutter about to herself as she opened the door. And when the door slid shut behind her, that's when I realized that that five foot two, perky barbie was on her way to fetch my fate.

And I was afraid.

The saliva in my mouth went sour as my stomach became queasy and started to flutter; agitating the wound in my right oblique more. I had no doubt that this feeling was genuine and I hadn't faced it in a very long time. It felt like stage-freight and getting caught lying mixed together with the anticipation of an enemy solider lurking just around the corner.

And sure enough Krystin, the saboteur of my secrecy, appeared on cue with a butterfly needle in hand.

"Now I know you've lost a lost of blood, Agent Romanoff, which is why I guess you were so hesitant, but I don't need too much to run my test. Just three viles is all I need, I promise." Krystin prepared the syringe, uncapping the tip.

"I guess I could spare some more…" I offered her my left arm.

She prepped the fold of my arm and stuck the first vein she found with ease. "Now just tell me if you feel faint or anything at all. I don't want to over exacerbate your current condition too much."

"I'll do my best to stick this out…"

"Ha! Look, you're making jokes all ready!" She laughed, her eyes watching the glass fill. "You know, you're not to_ shotti_e a patient with that kind of humor..."

I politely smiled back.

"Yup, you'll _needle_ little of that in life to deal with all the _pricks_." She slyly raised her brows and chortled. I rolled my eyes; what exactly is the bar Director Fury has set for our staff nurses?

As I studied the quick stream of blood filling the first vile, all the colors in the room became brilliant and hazy again. Even the white gown I was wearing began to hurt my eyes; this was torture.

Never once in all the brutal beatings I had received in my time in this business had I ever wanted to just tell the truth to escape the pain. I wanted to spit it out—to save her the time and to stop this unnecessary stress. I could tell her the results, I already knew what that blood test was going to reveal. Tony definitely saw it with his enhanced eyesight. I saw it weeks ago on a test strip. I just never thought...this was possible…now...with…. "Krystin—I—no more please…."

"Umm...Let's finish vile number two, okay? You're almost there!" She rubbed my exposed shoulder.

"Krystin."

"Hang in there! You survived being shot in the waist three times and nearly bled out. I know you can handle this Agent Romanoff."

"Krystin…."

"Just keep breathing, I'll go get you some water after this."

My throat felt like it was crushing my vocal chords and my chest and upper back were so hot that, in my growing deliriousness, I imagined the blood in the vile would begin to boil and pop the glass like mercury did in cartoons. My vision blurred and I had to draw all of my strength to breathe now. "Krys…tin…"

"Done! Agent Romanoff just keep breathing! I'll be right back!" Krystin dismantled the syringe and fled from the room. My eyes were intensely sensitive to the light now, but I did my best to keep them open. It seemed like an eon had passed before Krystin returned, with a water bottle and two ice packs. She opened the bottle and nearly splashed some of it on me as she put it in my hand. The relief trickled into my sore stomach as she position the covered cold bags on both sides of my upper body. "I apologize, but I had to get just a little bit more blood more."

I huffed, limply grinning.

"I managed to get two viles full…" Krystin reported, hoping to make me feel better.

"I hope that's—good enough—?"

"I'll have to stretch it some but it's not too big of a problem."

Life was coming back into my shriveled veins and the spots I had been seeing were rapidly disappearing. Even my hearing, which momentarily felt like an awful onset of tinnitus, was returning to normal. "Okay Good."

"Do you need anything else?" She took the empty water bottle from my grasp.

I pushed my head deeper back into the lush white pillow. "Just a nap…."

* * *

_Hey guys, _

_I'm super surprised that within a day of posting this story it's already gotten a few reviews. _

_To be honest, I'm just writing this story to keep up with some new skills I learned this semester in school so I hope you guys like how it's being written so far. I can't promise this being a very long story, but I can promise to make it as interesting as I humanly can. :]_

_Now onwards to Chapter Three!_

_—Berubi :3_


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: Talk of Children on the Hill (part 1)**

* * *

As I awoke for the umpteenth time, I heard a soft voice murmuring but I couldn't make out the exact words just yet. I peered over to my right and found the source—_his_ mouth and then _his_ whole face.

"…Amen." Steve opened his somber eyes and met mine immediately. "Natasha!"

"Were you...praying for me?"

"I was—Yes." he admitted. I sensed none of his usual shyness in his demeanor, not even the slightest bit of embarrassment for being heard in such a private moment. "Fury mentioned you had passed out again last night after blood work and I had to come see you despite the visitor restriction he placed on you."

I was shocked that he came here against orders, he must have been so miserable with some form of guilt. I placed my left hand on top of his folded ones. "I'm gonna be ok."

"You would have been fine if I had made a better call."

"Please don't do this." I knew where this was heading.

"It's the truth."

"No it's not. You're over internalizing this."

"No, I was responsible for—"

"Steve—" I tightened my grip. "Doom had the jump on us. But it doesn't matter now it's in the past, we all made it out of there okay, and that's all that matters. None of us lost anything."

"Made it out okay? Natasha, you nearly lost your life… because of…" His voice broke and trailed off; I knew Steve's senses of duty and morality were ebbing away at him. I could tell by his swollen eyelids and scruffy cheeks that he had neglected himself—punishing himself for _neglecting _to be a better leader.

"Because of myself." I slowly closed the gap between us. I spoke as softly as I could to not upset him any further. "I'm fully capable and responsible for myself in the field, Steve. I want you to stop blaming yourself and accept that _I_ left myself open. Not you. Please understand that—"

"Agent Romanoff! Thank god you're awake. Your results are in and—" when Krystin rounded the corner, she frightfully held the manila folder close. "––and so are you, Captain Rogers."

Steve flashed her a smile and bowed his head a bit as he sat back in his chair. I slunk back on to my elevated pillows.

"Well, I um…I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave, sir." Krystin started to usher him out. "Medical information is confidential, be it in a hospital or on this Helecarrier, and the information I have to relay to Agent Romanoff is personal. If you wouldn't mind?"

Steve glanced at me then nodded to her. Just as he was about to grab his shield from his chair's side, I reached out for him. "No. He can stay."

Krystin swallowed hard, her honey colored eyes flickering back and forth from the folder to my face. "Are you sure Agent Romanoff? I think you should probably hear this alone without Captain Rogers in the room?"

"I give you my consent to reveal your findings in Captain Rogers' presence, Krystin." I watched her face furrowed in confusion. The position I put her in was an awkward one but she did her best to conceal her nerves. Steve, however, began a nervous rapport on his shield.

"Right, Okay—" Krystin took a deep breath. "So the samples of your blood along with the bullet shards we were able to extract revealed that the bullets were coated with small traces of various rare elements along with vibranium… Not nearly a lethal amount though…."

"That's good." I tucked a few loose hairs behind my right ear.

"While you were out, we also pulled some of the surrounding tissue from your wound to test further for radiation and for other diseases. Cancer was high on the list of possible risks due to the exposure…" Steve's tapping stopped and his body tensed up.

"You're all clear there, Agent Romanoff. However, there is a chance that trances of the element are now circulating through your blood stream and you may be slightly more sensitive to sound.

I nodded. That would explain why Steve's gentle whispering woke me up.

"But the overall good news is, you're absolutely healthy and lucky." Krystin smiled. Steve sucked in a breath relief and rubbed his neck.

"...And so is your baby."

* * *

_Le Gasp,_

_So who figured out that was the secret? lol_

_r&r :3_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: Talk of Children on the Hill (part 2)**

* * *

Since Krystin left the room to retrieve the ultrasound machine, Steve sat dumbfound with his shield before him, as though he were guarding himself from the tiny being with me. He was comatose. I sighed.

"Hey...you all right?"

"Steve?"

"Steven?!"

His eyes finally did jerk my way after an extremely hard gulp of reality. "Natasha…is this really...happening?"

"Yes." I turned away from him, drawing the white sheets up to my neck.

"And you knew—all along?"

I looked over my right shoulder. "I—I did."

"How long?"

"If I've been counting right, I'm close to three months…" He mouthed the last part of the sentence and his eyes lit up; three months ago, his birthday, fourth of July weekend. He lowered the shield and stood up slowly, walking over to the tiny window with his hand covering his mouth.

"I was going to tell you... I just wasn't sure how."

"And you still went on missions this whole time?"

"Yes, but..."

"By yourself?"

His tan leather jacket stretched across his tensed back. "What were you thinking, Natasha? Why didn't you just tell me?"

"I told you, I was going to tell you but I—just couldn't."

"Couldn't or didn't want to?" Steve finally turned around pointing his irish nose at me accusingly. I wasn't hurt by his words; he had every right to hold that notion against my character. I am a spy after all: knowledge is leverage in my world—it's strength, power, truth, and lies. But I wasn't lying when I said I couldn't bring myself to tell him. I was afraid of hurting him by throwing this curve ball into his life after everything that's happened to him—_to us—_already.

The white sheet fell into my laps as I sat up. "I _am_ sorry Steve. And even though my actions completely betray my words I—"

"You still came with us to Latveria! What if—if you lost—"

Not a word I was saying was getting through; he was too caught up thinking about what could have been at stake on that failed mission. "God, will you please drop that?! It was a really bad decision on my part!"

Steve mashed and licked his lips, his neck muscles twitching as he ground his teeth. Hands folded, he sealed his lips with his index fingers and held his chin up by his thumbs. He wouldn't say anything else but he didn't need too; I already knew the damage I did.

I slung my legs over the left edge of the bed and slowly felt for the frosted metal floor beneath my feet. In an effort to display my well being, I withstood the urge to double over in pain and stood before him. Steve drew me into his arms and I embraced him fully, listening to his pounding, worried heart ease in its rhythm. "Please forgive me? I never meant for things to go down like this nor to cause you all this distress. And I definitely didn't want you to find out like this... "

I felt his lips brush the top of my hair. "Just never do this sort of thing again."

"I promise." We broke apart, managing to keep this moment to ourselves, before Krystin reappeared with the rolling machinery.

"Agent Romanoff, I don't think you should be standing so soon." she smiled cautiously.

"I'm fine, I was just stretching my legs." I shrugged, returning to bed. "Laying down for too long is not good, you know?"

"Well you're going to have to lay down again to see on your little one. Are you ready?"

I nodded and looked over to Steve, who finally had a tiny glow of pride and excitement grace his face. With her green gloves on, Krystin uncapped the white bottle of conductive gel then dimmed the lights. "Just lift the dress up enough so I can cover most of you lower abdomen with this stuff."

As I did, I noticed Steve politely look away as he walked closer to the machine. I did my best to withhold a chuckle. He knew what my bare body looked like, held it even, and yet he still averted his eyes out of decency. He really was from another time.

Now, flat on my back, I could on feel the chilled gel being slathered all over my lower half with the transducer sliding side to side. It was about five minutes before Krystin said anything. She turned tilted the screen down for me to see. "l found h—wait, do you want to know the sex?"

"Can you really do that?" Steve's eyes glimmered in amusement.

"Of course Captain Rogers. And even at this stage, you can hear the heartbeat too."

Steve and I exchanged glances. Though he seemed curious, there was something else in his face that spoke otherwise. I think that was the old fashioned part of him coming through again, wanting to go through the curiosity of guessing with me and our friends. And I agreed with that notion as it appealed to my own sense of secrecy. "Let's pass on i.d.'ing the baby. I think it will be fun watching everyone play fortune teller."

Krystin sucked her teeth playfully. "Well, would you like to hear the heartbeat at least?"

"As if you had to ask." I gave her a thumbs up.

All other noise in the room—my deep breaths and Steve's bewilder gasps—were drowned out by the deep booming drum of the baby's heart. As I listened to the soothing, warped beating, I realized I never wanted it to stop. And that terrified me, because there were people out there that would end it the first chance they got.

Maybe this is the first pain of motherhood? To face the fact that a part of you, so frail and vulnerable, would be walking around trusting everyone and everything like the notion of harm doesn't exist?

God, how could I ever enjoy having a cooing liability? One that hollers for people like Loki or Doom to come and take it?

My eyes began to well up so I closed them, smiling to keep face with Steve and Krystin. That heart beat was no longer a comforting white noise but rather the sound of impending danger knocking.

* * *

_Sorry about the late update guys. I was hoping to have this out Friday but work and my brother's birthday pushed this back. But that's ok, it gave me time to add on. I hope you enjoy it!_

_Thanks for all of your continued support, please R&R :]_


End file.
